Tuesday, February 14, 2012

A Love Letter To You

I never liked Valentine's Day. I was always the girl, without a boy, who was forced to witness others prove their "love" with chocolates and flowers.

I now realize I grew up watching one too many romantic comedies and deep down I always hoped some secret admirer would show up outside my window and express his love by holding a boom box over his head. So cliche, I know.

This never happened.

Valentine's Day always came and went and no declaration of love was ever made.

Now I could go on to tell you that eventually I met The ONE and, like so many others, my perception of Valentine's Day shifted. I could tell you vomit inducing stories of how I suddenly became loved and adored by this person and even though there was no boombox, this person did "boombox worthy" gestures on a regular basis. I could tell you how I now have so much love in my life, Valentine's Day is just another day I get to share with this person (where yes, I now get flowers).

But I won't.

While these things may be true (The Hubby will make you sick with his sweetness), that is not the point of this post.

The point of this Valentine's Day post is to not make you nausea of how spoiled I am on this hallmark holiday, but to take the opportunity to by express my own love and gratitude to all of you.

The point of this post is to say, Thank You.

My last post was a tough one for me. Even after publishing it and sending it out into the vast universe of the internet, I wondered if I made a mistake. What would people say? How would they react? I felt like I sent a love letter expressing my true feelings to a crush and out of fear of his reaction, suddenly wished I could take it back.

Part of me wanted to take the post back.

That fear of an unknown reaction can be paralyzing.

The reaction I got? One of undeniable love and support. Family, friends, coworkers, acquaintances, and even strangers, all reminded me just how blessed I am. Some people even thanked me. Imagine that -- being thanked for asking for help.

I was so caught up in my own fear of asking for help, I forgot how helpless people can feel in tough situations. I was so worried about being judged that I forgot that people want to help.

So again, Thank You.

Thank you to everyone who has sent love, prayers, blessings, good vibes, and of course, money. I feel both overwhelmed and grateful for the enormous amount of love in my life. I had no idea there were so many people out there wanting to steal the thunder back with their kindness.

But honestly, I feel undeserving. As grateful as I am, it still isn't easy to accept help from others. Being young and independent, the idea of needing help is still a daily struggle. And as The Hubby says in his own post, actually accepting help can be even harder than asking for it (I'm currently in therapy addressing this very issue, so expect more on that later).

But the point of this post isn't to address my issues. The point of this post is love. This is about the love that all of you have shown me over the last several months, and especially over the last week.

So thank you everyone for your outpouring of love and support.

I'll take that over flowers and chocolate any day.

No comments:

Post a Comment